Zero-day protection since 1693
We have never once been surprised by an exploit.
Total protection for the machines you don't own.
Amish Antivirus delivers uncompromising, enterprise-grade security for zero devices. Trusted for generations by families who have never been breached.
- 0 breaches since founding
- 0 packets inspected
- 100% uptime of the sun
No cloud. No telemetry. No electricity.
Your data stays exactly where it has always been. Nowhere.
Definition updates quarterly, by mail
Each update arrives in a plain envelope, hand-addressed. Weather permitting.
Fully air-gapped architecture
Our infrastructure achieved permanent air gap and has maintained it since.
Firewall included
A literal wall. Fieldstone. Blocks everything.
Support from sunrise to sunset
Real people, available dawn to dusk. Closed Sundays.
How it works
Purchase the box.
Place the box near where a computer would be.
Continue not owning a computer. Protection is immediate and total.
“We have used Amish Antivirus for eleven years. In that time, not one virus.”
“I asked my grandson what phishing is. We fish with worms.”
“The box is very well made.”
One payment. No subscription. Ever.
- Renewal fee: $0, forever.
- Ask about the family plan. It is the same box.
Where to buy
Select roadside stands. Cash only.
No returns have ever been necessary.
- Compliant with: common sense.
- Certified by: the community.